Monday, July 05, 2010

It's Been A While

A lot can happen in a few months it seems! I was just reading over my last post and am amazed by all that has transpired since then. To write in detail about it all would take approximately forever, so I'll just give a brief synopsis...

We discovered with delight in mid-March that our first child was on the way! No one could have been more thrilled than we were... we talked to the baby, prayed, planned and dreamed. At 10 weeks I was scheduled for my first ultrasound and we counted down the days. Everything had been going well...

We saw our baby but something was very wrong. Too small for 10 weeks and with no heartbeat, our precious child was already with the Lord and we were devastated. Our amazing Colorado Springs family surrounded us in the ensuing horrible hours and my mom, sister-in-law, and best friend arrived two days later to be with us while I went through surgery and while we recovered emotionally. Anyone who has had a miscarriage knows how much it hurts... my arms literally ached to hold my baby.

But God. So many times I've seen those two words throughout Scripture and lately they have gotten my attention. But God. He was there in our grief and gave us grace to worship him through our sorrow. As tears flowed we remember that God lost His Son... he knew how we felt. We are so grateful for His nearness in our brokenness and though we would love to have our child back, we have peace.

Within a week after our miscarriage we both knew that it was time to move. God had been putting such a burden on both of our hearts to move closer to Steve's family in Wisconsin. We began making plans, notifying our landlord that we would move when our lease was up at the end of June and notifying our places of employment of our plans. We didn't have any jobs lined up but knew that God would provide... He was leading us, after all. He DID provide! Steve is pursuing a position through classes and an internship that would result in the job of his dreams and I have the job of my dreams in a large children's hospital in Milwaukee working in the pediatric ICU. We just moved last Thursday and are getting settled in! We spent the weekend with Steve's family and my family is flying in for the coming one. We feel God calling us to pursue becoming foster parents and are beginning to work on getting licensed. Foster children so desperately need loving, stable homes and we are so excited about this new journey!

We're not where we thought we'd be, but we're thankful. The Lord knows what He is doing and I believe that now more than ever! I have a feeling that He is going to do some awesome things in the coming months... I'll try to keep you posted.